The Most Extrodinary Loss Imaginable
In the end the sickness took her body, but although it tried it could never take her spirit.
My mother, my mom, my friend was the stongest, toughest, fiercest lady I have ever had the honor to know. She brought me threw thick and thin and yet her faith in who I will someday become never waivered. And even though I was sure I would never leave these four walls, she said she seen me on some boat, taking picture's of some strange fish, in some beautiful place.
Her faith in who I am to become, and her unwaivering love for the person I still am, made her my mom.
Her friendship I was always honored to have. I told her once that after watching her brave thru cancer and surgeries, and still she shone, and she was always ready to fight again made me stronger and want to fight my own pain, as hard as I could. "That is what she gave me, strength!"
"She told me once that if her whole purpose on the earth was to help me learn to deal with my disability, and learn to deal with being in pain, then having cancer and all her suffering was worth it. Because she was my mom, and if that was the lesson she was supposed to pass on, then she was okay with that". (I'M not)
Even in the end, she looked up into my eyes and told me not to worry, that I had nothing to worry about, and not to be so sad.
We were very lucky to have had her for so long, as fate could have stepped in at anytime and taken her before she was done preparing us.
My brother for fatherhood, she was so proud of how he was doing.
And for me, to someday walk on my own, and be able to stand tall, knowing that because of the life she lived, I am a stronger, more compassionate person, not quite like her, but I am still learning......
I miss you mom, more than I can express with mere words. And although my heart aches and I see nothing but darkness I know that because of your guidence, love and ever presence. I will be okay, someday. Maybe not soon, but I promise, someday.....